"Forty-five Lessons Life Taught Me" by Regina Brett

Written by Regina Brett of the Plain Dealer, Cleveland , Ohio .
"To celebrate growing older, I once wrote the 45 lessons life taught me.
It is the most requested column I've ever written.

My odometer rolled over to 90 in August, so here is the column once more:

1. Life isn't fair, but it's still good..

2. When in doubt, just take the next small step.

3. Life is too short to waste time hating anyone.

4. Your job won't take care of you when you are sick. Your friends and parents will. Stay in touch.

5. Pay off your credit cards every month.

6. You don't have to win every argument. Agree to disagree.

7. Cry with someone. It's more healing than crying alone.

8. It's OK to get angry with God. He can take it.

9. Save for retirement starting with your first paycheck.

10. When it comes to chocolate, resistance is futile.

11. Make peace with your past so it won't screw up the present.

12. It's OK to let your children see you cry.

13. Don't compare your life to others. You have no idea what their journey is all about.

14. If a relationship has to be a secret, you shouldn't be in it.

15. Everything can change in the blink of an eye. But don't worry; God never blinks.

16. Take a deep breath It calms the mind.

17. Get rid of anything that isn't useful, beautiful or joyful.

18. Whatever doesn't kill you really does make you stronger.

19. It's never too late to have a happy childhood. But the second one is up to you and no one else.

20. When it comes to going after what you love in life, don't take no for an answer.

21. Burn the candles, use the nice sheets, wear the fancy lingerie. Don't save it for a special occasion. Today is special.

22. Over prepare, then go with the flow.

23. Be eccentric now. Don't wait for old age to wear purple.

24. The most important sex organ is the brain.

25. No one is in charge of your happiness but you.

26. Frame every so-called disaster with these words :'In five years, will this matter?'

27. Always choose life..

28. Forgive everyone everything.

29. What other people think of you is none of your business.

30. Time heals almost everything. Give time time.

31. However good or bad a situation is, it will change.

32. Don't take yourself so seriously. No one else does.

33. Believe in miracles.

34. God loves you because of who God is, not because of anything you did or didn't do.

35. Don't audit life.. Show up and make the most of it now.

36. Growing old beats the alternative -- dying young.

37. Your children get only one childhood.

38. All that truly matters in the end is that you loved.

39. Get outside every day. Miracles are waiting everywhere.

40. If we all threw our problems in a pile and saw everyone else's, we'd grab ours back.

41. Envy is a waste of time. You already have all you need.

42. The best is yet to come...

43. No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and show up.

44. Yield.

45. Life isn't tied with a bow, but it's still a gift."

Who are we, really?

 It seems like we are one person on the inside, and yet we often act like someone else. Can a good person do bad things? Can a bad person do good things? It's pretty confusing, isn't it?

Self discovery and awareness teaches us that we can change who we are by changing the things we do. We can become the kind of person we want to be by acting as if we are already that person. For example, if we want to be healthy, we can act as if we are a healthy person; that is, don't consume the things you know are not consistent with health, and don't hang out in places that open the door to temptation. If we want to be a caring person, we can do caring actions for others.

We are the person we feel like on the inside. We are also the person we act like on the outside. With personal development and awareness, we change how we think, feel, and act. We practice making changes in each of these areas, and every time we do well in one area, we help in the others too.

Opening up to Universal Power

I will open my self to the Universe today. Both on an individual and a universal level, Universal energy, love, is there waiting for me to let it in. This is my birthright, just as the air and the sun are as much mine as anyone's - Universal energy is here for me. There is no price tag on it, no being good enough in the eyes of the world to finally deserve it. All that is required is a recognition and a willingness to allow Universal energy into my life and heart, into my being. For me to understand that this is available to me at all times requires a paradigm shift. It asks me to see differently - to look for and identify the mystery of Universal energy in the world as it is, to see unity in diversity and perfection in what is apparently imperfect. Understanding Universal energy asks me to look behind the thin veil of reality and glimpse the infinite.

Choice of attention

Many of us have said, "I can't help myself!" when we tried to stop our constant thinking about other people or their behavior. "I know it's not good for me, but what can I do when they keep acting that way?"

Let us think of ourselves as living in a house with many windows. At each window is a different view, and within each view are many things to catch our attention -- perhaps there are some people, some traffic, some buildings, a horizon, and some trees. If we always go to the same window and focus on the same object, we are not using all our choices. We may have overlooked some things in our lives that need attention. There are many things we are totally powerless over. Our power exists in changing the focus of our attention.

Prayer

Today I pray with the full, unseparated power of God within me. I am one with spirit. When I align myself with the God-force that is present and alive in all things, my prayer has meaning and strength. When I pray to the God-center of my being, I bring a troubled spirit in touch with the light of God. When I pray with full faith that this universe is meant for me and those in it, with a genuine awareness that God and I are one, that there is no separation, then I place my hand on the switch that has power and light behind it. Prayer is dynamic. It speaks to the benevolent force of love and creativity that brings life to this world. I will pray each day, knowing that my prayers are meant to be fulfilled.